Counted Blessings

I came home today, complained about my day. (thought it was justified)

I tried to help with math homework, and couldn't, and wished my skills were better. (not proud)

I lectured my son about taking responsibility for his education, and boiled over with frustration, barely allowing him to speak.  (not a moment I am grateful for, I need to find a better way)

I ranted about procrastination.  I harped about things being done in a timely matter.  I was h.a.n.g.r.y. tonight after having gone too long without food.  ( my own damn fault - all of it)

And as I laid here in bed, trying to wear off some of what was winding me up, I heard a mother lost her son. I heard tonight, that she doesn't get to say goodnight.  My heart stopped, and just like in a movie, my whole day rewound in my head, warnings of regrets and nightmares.  Oddly - it is that moment of rewinding and whispered warnings that I am grateful for.

In my tears for another mom tonight, I am grateful for the frustrating moments over math problems and upside down test scores.  I am grateful for apologies, I am grateful for sharing dinner at the table, no matter the hour with my children.  I am grateful at the end of my day to have my babies close to me, dreaming in the hours, peaceful and safe.

For he who protects us, who works so hard for family, who loves with an unmatched love.  For a job that provides with ease, for a house that shelters us in warmth.  For all the things we have to wait for, and for the time...  Grateful.

Blessings.

(make sure you count yours.  I did.)